Wednesday, September 13, 2017

here I am, years later. Still running, but now a nurse and a mom of 2 teenagers. so much has happened over the years I gave up writing here. I find myself back just to write out what I feel because, today has been one of the most trying days of my life. This is where to go to vent. So another chapter of my life has started. I currently work at a rehab center with a variety of patients ranging from very stable to unstable, like should have stayed at the hospital unstable. I also take care of people on the other side of that spectrum with mental issues caused by aging like dementia . Being a nurse has been one of the best choices I have ever made in my life. I love it and wish I would have done it years ago. My Dad knew I would be a nurse when I grew up. It took me a long time to grow up, but here I am.
  Speaking of my Dad he has been diagnosed with prostate cancer back in August. He went through a biopsy where he had 12 samples taken and everyone of the samples shown it to be cancer. He has a Gleason score of mostly 10. This meaning he has the most aggressive cancer you can have. As far as we know it is contained within the prostate. Further tests show that it has no spread to other organs. The feeling that undergoes my body is not even explainable until you go through it. Some days are better than others, for me tears stream down I would say every few days or so. Today by far was the hardest day since this journey started. I sat in the doctors office with my Dad and watched my strong Dad that is tough fall apart and just sob. It was at the point I had to take over a talk for him. My heart dropped into my stomach. Nothing worse than watching your parent cry. After all they are supposed to be the strong ones.
  Today marks the first day of the rest of my Dads life. Her received his first Lupron shot. As I understand this is a hormone that is supposed to stop the cancer dead in its tracks. I pray that, that is exactly what is does. He goes back in December for his surgery. I pray that he overcomes this nasty disease and we can live one day at a time happy with the ones we love.......until next time.